We're recording up forward in the desert, and you must forgive me if I am shouting because I am shouting against the voices of some of the very very heavy guns and there's a terrific barrage going on...
I gotta tell you this crazy little story; there we were
We were members of the 69th Platoon
In a strange desert, like the ones you see on the news
I got used to being one of the only chicks,
Nicknamed Sergeant Hotlips,
Because I could use my lizard ring to measure any soldier's cock with
Which I didn't do, because I had a good reputation
Defending our nation,
Even though nobody knew what we were invading
105 degrees, 105 push-ups--yes sir, please
Pray for a breeze while you prayed for peace
Prayed like priests, sweat on the back of my knees
The back of the barracks smelled like cheese
Took off my fatigues, so tired and fatigued, please
Looking for vigilantes in itchy Army-issue panties
Camps giving me balm and canteens
Mothballs and latrines, the general was mean
Lights out green
I was on a date with this really hot dude
The kind that you know would look really hot nude
About to order food, but the panic alarm blared
So sharp and scared
Wished I was there, said at the sand of my two inch hair [?], it's not fair
Ladies wanna go out and talk and eat
Don't wanna get in between the sheets
Ladies wanna go out and talk and eat
Gotta get it together babe, get it together babe
Ladies wanna go out and talk and eat
Don't wanna get in between the sheets
Ladies wanna go out and talk and eat
The battle: the general said there was an attack on the capitol
They're fanatical but trackable, flying shrapnel; they need tactical!
Back about the bomb stay calm, it's on
Like Vietnam vs. the Pentagon
Strapped on fifty pounds of machine guns like a Terminator with a tampon against the jihad
Landmines and a corpse
Left and right of the course
Looking through my binoculars like some insane tourist
City took by force, like wildfires in the forest
Cast like a Britney song without a chorus
I look like Chuck Norris
All of a sudden, an enemy approached
Drew my weapon, but then he spoke:
"Let's end this war; you're hot, yo." I choked.
A bullet shot out but his heart had missed; my heart was hit
He was the man of my dream, the one I was about to kiss
Ladies wanna go out to talk and eat
Don't wanna get in between the sheets
Ladies wanna go out and talk and eat
Ladies wanna go out and talk and eat
Don't wanna get in between the sheets
Ladies wanna go out and talk and eat
Gotta get it together, 'cause it's forever like that, come on
Better get it together, 'cause it's forever like that, come on
Ran into the crossfire, dragged him to the tank
"I caught an enemy," shouted to my ranks.
"Well done, Private." "Thanks!"
Tied a rag around his wound like straw
Dog tags said "Dr. Octagon"
His glock was on; I touched myself where his cock belonged
At dawn he awoke in our enemy camp hospital
Like _Mission Impossible_
And to top this shit all off, I knew I was in love
Question was, should I serve my country or my cunt? The woman below or the man above?
What!
This was the hardest decision I ever had to make, uh-huh
Who knew I was gonna fall in love with a prisoner whose brain was a metal plate?
Great.
"I wish we could go out, man, eat a nice meal."
He said, "Bitch, I'm in an Army prison hospital bed, trying to heal! For real!"
"I'm sorry," I said, "I forgot.
We can't even go to the crappy cafeteria; you're gonna get shot."
"Stop crying," he said, "one day this stupid war is gonna end.
I got a lotta oil but you know, you and me could still be friends."
Ladies wanna go out to talk and eat
Don't wanna get in between the sheets
Ladies wanna go out and talk and eat
Ladies wanna go out and talk and eat
Don't wanna get in between the sheets
Ladies wanna go out and talk and eat
Gotta get it together, 'cause it's forever like that, come on
Yeah, uh-huh, me and Dr. Octagon
Spending my veteran checks on Moets [?]
Watching reality TV in the US, aw yes
You know what? Huh, forget about the talking
Just eat. Yeah, eat. Eat it.
Princess Superstar!
